I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize