Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
