The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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