No, you can still breathe under the balls.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
