Barsexuality is the new black.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
