gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
