$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
