About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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