I heard we made out
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
