I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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