Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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