I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
