Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize
