question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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