He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
