I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
