Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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