Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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