I'm so fucking centered right now
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
