well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
