Whod you bang
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
