Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Randomize