We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
