All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize