..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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