well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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