go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
