She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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