just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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