Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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