is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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