I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize
