hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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