My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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