This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
