His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
