When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
It's rum buckets o'clock
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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