i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
