actually, I'm a sock model
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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