I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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