If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
