IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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