remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
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