Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
