when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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