Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
