i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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