Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
