Where is the hickey?
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
