oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
